Album of the Week: Natalie Portman's Shaved Head- Glistening Pleasure

I hated high school. Normally I wouldn't make a point of starting a review with a bit of personal history, especially one so mundane, but I think it's important to my reaction to Glistening Pleasure. You see, when I went to high school, there were no cool artsy, indie chicks. I was a man on an island. Imagine my surprise when I got to college, and it seemed like half the people I met dressed in clever t-shirts and told tales of whistling the Pixies. After a year or two of this, it got to be kind of annoying. Partially because I didn't feel quite so unique anymore, but mostly because I felt like I had missed out on something in high school. To put it simply: where were the cool indie chicks I was supposed to be dating then?? Such a waste, because by the time I got to college, they were mostly done with guys like me. Luckily, I would prove to be strange and interesting enough that they could get past the skinny indie rock boy exterior. But I digress.

Glistening Pleasure provides a taste of what high school might have been like if I had been born somewhere else. If I had had the awesome indie music and weird, absurdist worldview, but also had known the euphoria of young love. This is what the album captures to me. Strange that I love this album so much, because based on the album artwork, I was so determined to hate it. It's like everything I find irritating about indie bands, all in one place. The ridiculous, unwieldly name; the "let's all dress in thrift store outfits and generally try to look like douchebags"; the "ha ha ha, so random!! so crazy!!" cover art; the 'clever' song titles like 'Beard Lust', 'Holding Hands In the Shower', and 'Sophisticated Side Ponytail.' However, I quickly came to the realization that for some people, all of this stuff is new and clever. I remember doing similar things in high school, when my microcosmic view of the world--despite the Internet--didn't allow for the fact that other people bought thriftstore clothes or ironically appreciated bad things. But I can't hold it against Natalie Portman's Shaved Head because even though all of this is ancillary, it actually fits their music aesthetic. I'd go so far as to say that if they didn't have the stupid name and "we're so fun!! crazy!!" thing going on, I wouldn't like them as much.

Let's get one thing straight, though. Since I left high school, I've turned into a cynical, bitter old man. I've grown old and disappointed with life before I'm supposed to. When I see young kids...specifically, when I see the young kids in Natalie Portman's Shaved Head, I unconsciously sneer. But I think a healthy portion of that sneer is jealously, because I wish I was still so full of life and energy. I wish I could dress like an idiot and play catchy synth-pop. I wish I was still a skinny beanpole instead of a skinny beanpole with a post-college alcohol paunch/starving-African-child-with-potbelly physique. Anyway.

Glistening Pleasure is one of the few synth-pop albums I actually like. Indeed, love. I've tried to give bands like Hot Chip, the Klaxons, CSS, YACHT, etc. chances before, but they just don't do it for me. The difference with Natalie Portman's Shaved Head is that their songs have enough hooks, melodies, and ideas that I can get past the kitschy retro keyboard-led music and just enjoy myself. Listening to the album is like attending the ideal senior prom; perhaps a better way to put it is that every song is a party you want to attend. Putting it on reminded me of hearing Beck's Midnite Vultures for the first time: just that constantly fun and strikingly-original-despite-building-from-obvious-influences sexy funk R&B dance party vibe. I don't want to like it--everything in my curmudgeonly, Tom Waits-inebreiated brain screams out "no!!"--but I do. Perhaps best of all, the band have clearly taken cues from other keyboard-heavy bands like the Fiery Furnaces, The Unicorns, and Of Montreal in that the songs aren't all straightforward chorus/bridge/chorus formulas, and they make equally good use of guitars. 'Hush Hush' is the best example of this, with its falsetto singing, 60s garage rock style rhythm guitar, and the brief respite that comes near the two-minute mark in which most of the instruments die away and the singer lowers his voice. Also, OK, I'll admit that 'Beard Lust' is fantastic, and sounds like something you might hear in an episode of Tim and Eric's Awesome Show, Great Job!

The highest praise I can give Natalie Portman's Shaved Head is that I wanted to hate them but ended up loving them. The slightly-lower-but-still-high praise I can give them is that they melted my black-iceberg-heart a little bit with their incredible music. Everytime I've questioned giving this Album of the Week, I listen to it again, and am reminded of how vivid and entertaining Glistening Pleasure truly is.